I hadn’t felt inspired since the night I painted Hope. I could convince myself that I was still working on art because I was learning something. It was a thin deception.Just as I’d accepted my violent racquetball practices as sport.Lissa joined me on the court Monday afternoon expecting to pick up where we’d left off, but I was way beyond that. She walked off the court after half an hour. I hardly noticed she was missing. I walked off the court an hour-and-a-half later, dripping sweat.“Where’d you go?” I asked.“I couldn’t stay on the court with you, Tony.”“Why?”“You’ve always been intense, whether it was racquetball or art or making love, dear. But I’ve never felt I was in danger. Now I do.”She walked away and left the club. I shoved my gear in my locker. Afraid of me? She was afraid of me? What have I become?I took off out of the club on a dead run. I ran for two hours, pushing as hard as I could along the shoreline, across the locks, uphill toward Wallingford, around Green Lake,. I was staring intently at this girl and my cock has gotten rock hard just by staring at her. That’s the age guys, what can I say. I put a hand in my pocket to hold my cock to avoid anyone seeing it make a tent in my pants. But the problem with that is my hand automatically started rubbing it through the cloth. It took a lot of effort for me to control myself. The girl suddenly raised her head and noticed that she was being watched by me. She made eye contact for a brief moment and went back to her paper.A few minutes later she is done with the paper and arched her back relaxingly and finally looked at me. I didn’t know what to do, but she actually gave me a smile. It was like a beautiful flower blooming in the full of early spring. I meekly smiled back at her and ran back to my class. I couldn’t focus on the class anymore that day and I ran straight to the bathroom when I went home and masturbated happily thinking of that girl. It was one of the best cum I had at that time. I had to.
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